One of my students ignores me and does his own flows?

This seems a bit like when people in a spin class just put it on high resistance and low cadence through the whole class no matter what the instructor says. Annoying, but if being around others motivates them then, well, it’s their journey.

What I would say, though, is that especially in a yoga class this member should stay in the back so when other students look at you they are only seeing people who are trying the same form. He may be distracting to you, but at least the students will still benefit. If he’s in the middle of everyone that’s inappropriate.

TLDR: he’s rude, but your annoyance should be on behalf of the other practitioners, not about your ego as a teacher.

As a distractable neuro-atypical person, I am not a perfect yogi, able to tune out the world. In fact I come to class to learn some of those skills. But it is unnecessarily distracting when a student does their own thing right front and center, or makes noise during the more meditation-like end to class.

Yoga is a personal practice, but coming to studio is also about communing with other yogis. If his attitude is “if others are bothered, that’s their own problem”, he’s being a shitty part of the community. You as a teacher should be able to address that. But not because he’s not following your flow, but because he’s making it difficult for others to connect and focus.

You are annoyed because a man joined your prenatal class that you expected to be all female. Males are allowed only "technically," according to you.

You are annoyed because he does not do the routine you teach, whereas you expect him to comply with your instruction.

You chased the man down multiple times and he avoided you. This annoyed you even more.

Control issues and unrealistic exceptions speak louder here than your rationalizations and projections

As an instructor and student, it doesn’t bother me at all if someone is doing their own thing in class.

I’m shocked you made the “maverick” comment during practice - that seems so rude. And then approaching the person twice to question their practice? Ouch.

We’re paid to teach the class and create a pleasant environment - not police people’s chosen movements.

One of the guiding principles of yoga is to find comfort in the discomfort.

His behavior is making you feel uncomfortable, but you can't change him, you can only change yourself.

This is about you releasing control and finding a way to not let any of this bother you, or quitting and going to a different studio with different expectations for student behavior.

When I'm a student, I don't even notice anybody else. But when I'm teaching, it drives me crazy when a student isn't doing what I say!!! But usually that student is also one of the most loving and appreciative personalities in the class. So I've learned/am learning to let go. The warmth of that student I give freedom to is worth it. I'm just glad she comes to my class, even if she does her own thing a lot!

In savanna, sometimes I am so deep the world is me. In a different studio by a gym I have to do yin in a dulled blaring studio. Other times my mind is still racing and in the first studio the quiet helps intensely.

Their avoidance to engage with you could be any number of things but it is fair for you to ask them to keep quiet during savanna, this should be your only goal and ideally they stay at the back of the class as I often use a class for ques and a random person in a random pose requires me to focus in more especially when I don't have full view of the teacher.

I get that they need a class to motivate it's just annoying their schedule aligns to this class.

Stay strong. Stay focused. Be clear and direct with kindness... ...what I suspect is aggravating is their lack of situational awareness on multiple levels.

I disagree with a lot of the comments. It sounds like it is intentionally aggressive, including his avoiding you. This is very different from doing a tripod headstand while everyone is in prasarita.

That being said, this is out of your control and it’s time for management - including as an employee. If you’ve told the owners and this is their response, it’s for you to do the thing that least harms. Which right now is nothing / following what the studio owners say. You can have an interesting time with your resistance if you have some.

But I would pay close attention to anything he does to make other students uncomfortable, without projecting your frustration. If he disrupts other students and you know or see, continue to bring it to the attention of management.

We had this issue in a dance class and eventually between everyone getting used to it and paying him no mind, it died out. But kaplabati during savasana would sure be irritating.

I don’t even think seated straddle is that much of a departure from goddess… like I totally see students do a seated straddle in WLFF or horse/goddess. You don’t know his life or his schedule. He might live in a small space and have a crazy schedule and can only make your prenatal class and just want space to explore his practice. I can tell you from all my years of teaching I have had TONS of students not do a word I say, and tell me they’re not really into my flow but for one reason or another (they like my vibe, my playlist, my time slots are convenient) they keep coming back to my class. It’s truly an honor to make space for someone’s practice and I’m not offended in the slightest. Also making comments about my looks or my practice would make me wildly uncomfortable.

TLDR: YTA, OP

i all for students modifying the practice, and I'm open to have a student in the back of the class doing their own flow for whatever reason. I have a student who wears earbuds set to Noise Cancelling and no music .

but. kapalabati? or any intentional distracting noises during opening meditation? no. I'd immediately approach them and ask them to practice quietly or elsewhere.

I'd have a hard time with a student listening to something in their ears, the studio i teach has a no phones policy, so that's enforceable. and we are encouraged to remove disruptive students - though in 10 years I've never done so. probably a few times i should have

I’m shocked by replies that are telling you to let go of your ego. That’s bullshit. It’s a safety issue for everyone. Sequence order matters. Other students may start to follow suit. You can’t manage all of that in a large led class.

And it’s rude.

Doing child’s pose or another variation is more than fine but doing your own routine in a class not designed for that is not.

I’m not a teacher so I hope this is allowed. I used to practice in a studio that was very frequently in the path of an ambulance. The instructors made it a point to say something like, “this is what we are here for, we are here to learn to bring our focus back onto what we want while still being aware of the ambulance. We aren’t here to not hear the ambulance. We are not here for the ambulance.”

This guy might be a gentle teachable moment for the rest of the class. Most of the students are not there for that guy. That guy is there for himself and he will get something from the class. It may not be what you intend.

Perhaps teaching yoga is like a meditation for you, having to constantly choose what what you need and want to be aware of? I would bet that you spend a lot of time monitoring how you feel about what you notice, letting go of your judgements of others and yourself.

I'm voting with he is out of place.

Imagine for a moment that was no tuition...just free. Yoga is scheduled from 10-1:30 on Tuesdays and Room X has a sign saying this room is reserved for Yoga 10am Tuesdays.

Would you all be OK with Joe gym member just wandering in and setting up a HIIT session in the middle of class? You remind him that the room is reserved for Yoga class, and he replies "I just want to work out in this space."

I think most places the answer is no, you can't because the room is reserved for Yoga class.

Modifying Yoga postures is a time-honored tradition, but coming in and doing your own workout is not participating in class, it's simply invading the space reserved for class.

they said as long as he paid and wasn’t violating any rules

Are there any rules about respecting teachers? About not interfering with other students experience? If so, he's breaking them and should be out.

I was “on his side”, basically, until I heard about the weird breathwork during the PRENATAL cool-down.

This is not just a “let him be him” space… I can see nearly any other yoga…but this is ugh and tbh so weird. Weird weird dude who just HAS to be “in community”—with a room full of pregnant women. Let him go body-double with some dudes.

Similar situation from a student perspective. There is one guy at my studio who is - not even in a corner but sometimes front and center of the room - doing push-ups or an entirely different flow. Maybe I’m a bad yogi but it just feels like bad energy weirdly to completely disregard what the instructor suggests and everyone else is doing, especially when he’s being noisy. Yes I can still focus and balance regardless but I internally groan when I see that he’s joining us for class because I don’t like his vibes.

I liked what another person said about requiring him to have headphones off for safety at the very least.

It’s not your yoga class. You’re teaching a class he paid to be in. It’s technically his yoga class, and he’s paying you to be there. Making you the hired help. You work for a company and these are their rules.

Harness your chi and humble yourself

what a tool - not much you can do but ignore him.

I would imagine an ego-maniac like this will actually go away when he finds that no one thinks he's special.

maybe he was sent to you by the universe to teach you patience. :)

Wow, the ego on you...

If the breathing is distracting other people, it's an issue and to be addressed for the whole of the class.

Everything else is just your ego being bruised.

I go to a lot of yoga, both free outdoor and indoor classes led my instructors. 2 of the 4 instructors I have recently had, literally told the class that they would be happy regardless of whether the class chose to follow their flow or did something different. One example given was that it would be totally ok if someone just wanted to sit in child’s pose the entire session.

So I think it’s possible your student might have gotten messaging from the community, but not you, that this behavior is ok.

I agree that asking him to do it in the back of class seems like a good way to go.

You sound like you are struggling with your ego.

Sounds like you don't want a student not following you. You sound threatened and hurt by the student who is not watching and doing exactly what you do.

I thoroughly doubt any student in the studio gives a hoot what this guy is doing. You are projecting your own thoughts and fears onto other students (he's distracting them, then they won't look at me either!)

You are being annoying. You call him in front of an entire class, instead of plainly sharing your opinion and asking for what you want. You hound him with questions when he just wants to chill to the point that he feels he has to leave the space where you are.

Live and let live, for goodness' sake!

Calling the student a maverick and telling him he shouldn't be taking your class if he doesn't do your flows was unprofessional. It seems as though your ego may be a bit hurt that he didn't follow your flow and blew you off, which is understandable, but you still owe this student the respect you're expecting of him.

I'd also challenge your reaction that it's "BS" that the presence of others motivates him and that's why he takes class. People take yoga classes for a whole host of reasons, and this one is perfectly valid.

You may have better success with this student if you make a point to get to know him, show genuine curiosity and interest in his practice, and then INVITE him to try your flows. I might suggest apologizing, asking him if you could start fresh and then taking these steps after some time has passed.

If he still does his own thing and IF his breathing and/or moving is legitimately distracting to others, once you've gotten to know him, you could politely ask him to be more mindful of the times he is engaging in louder breathwork and larger/faster movements so that he is at least matching the general energy of the specific class / portion of class he's in and to position himself near the back of the room.

I do think it's valid that students would be distracted by someone doing breath of fire during Savasana, but if he's matching the general energy of the class, it's also completely valid for him to flow how he pleases. Each of our own bodies is our best teacher.

Ultimately, our job as yoga teachers is to create a safe space for people to complete THEIR practice. As long as his practice is not interfering in the space being safe and inviting for others, you need to let things be or you risk hurting your relationship with him and/or the studio owners if you press it with them.

My advice is kind of a mix of what I’ve seen in the comments. As far as him doing his own thing, I’d let him. It’s not uncommon in my experience to see students doing their own thing/modifying heavily. No student has ever expressed that it’s distracting. I honestly would just let that one go.

The Kapalabhati breathing is another story. I’ve had to have several conversations with students about sounds they make during the yin portion of class and/or Savasana. If it’s loud and jarring during times of silence it should be addressed in my opinion.

Ultimately, however, I wouldn’t push it too much if the studio owner/manager has made it clear they are fine with students doing their own flow in class. If you bring it to their attention every time he’s in class you will soon become an annoyance to them unfortunately.

I think everyone here is handling this poorly.

On his end, even if you're fine with him doing his own postures:

• He is doing loud and distracting energetic breathing during shavasana.
• He's wearing AirPods at a yoga class (does your studio have a no tech policy?)
• This is a PRENATAL class. It's really specific, and anyone with even a minimal level of respect would know it's important to keep with the energy level of the class and not be distracting.
• He's obviously intentionally rude based on his behavior and comments.

On the instructor's end:

• In the one example you gave, he's actually doing a similar posture. Goddess and seated straddle are both hip openers, and I would consider this a pretty normal variation. If this is the best example you have of him doing a different posture from the rest of the class, then it sounds like he is doing variations of what you're cueing.
• Making a joke wasn't the best way to handle this, though I get it, sometimes humor is the natural reaction to an awkward situation.
• Trying to confront him multiple times when he was clearly trying to evade was obviously not going to end in a positive result. You probably should have gone to the management first. You'll likely lose prenatal students if he keeps coming, and that's a shame, because prenatal is so niche and hard to find.

How to proceed? I would focus on the experience of the other students and not your hurt feelings:

• If there's a no phones/no tech policy, you can ask him to put his tech away.
• You can ask that he not make noise during shavasana. You don't even have to ask him specifically, you can use some general language at the beginning of shavasana. If he doesn't listen or doesn't hear it because of his headphones, you can mention it to him again specifically after class.
• In a non-leading manner, you can ask other students after class how they're feeling and how the class went. If he's constantly disrupting shavasana, it probably won't be long before someone mentions it.

Everyone’s practice is different. It sounds like you’re really attached to your role as teacher, but part of being a good teacher means understanding that people have different needs. He may have trauma or be neurodivergent, for all you know. His needs have nothing to do with you, so you shouldn’t be taking his actions personally. You confronting him and making comments about him being a maverick aren’t very conducive to creating a safe space.

My teachers always said that if someone falls asleep and snores, or a siren goes off during savasana, that it’s part of the yogic experience. We experience life as it comes. Don’t try to control someone. Use the annoyance as an opportunity to practice maintaining your peace.

I would just let him do his thing... and maybe just ask him nicely if he can make space for the quiet time when you create that space for the rest of the class. And maybe just explain that this could be the only quiet moment someone gets for the whole day or even week and we don't want to steal someone's experience or peace.

Honestly I kind of think you are stealing his experience as well. He paid to be there. If someone at my studio approached me like that I would be mortified. I probably would not take their class ever again and feel so uncomfortable if I saw them in the studio and probably anxious just thinking about it before I even left my house. I sometimes do my own thing because my autoimmune disease causes me to have joint pain. I literally did this today. So you shouldn't expect your flow to be accessible to everyone or for everyone to like your flow.

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. You know your intuition is telling you something and the behaviour you’ve described here sounds like someone who is not respectful of the rest of the class.

On paper, this sounds like a cis dude who wants to be around pregnant people while wearing AirPods lol. Not a feature I’d want to keep paying for as a student!

A suggestion you could make to him: if he wants to do his own thing there are other, open classes he can join to keep motivated, and he can talk to those teachers about keeping his AirPods in and doing his own routine entirely.

I don’t agree with other comments that you’re somehow the problem here — it sounds like you want to provide a relaxing and catered space for people who are experiencing pregnancy; not babysit an oblivious grown man 🤷🏼‍♀️

Good luck!!

I would look within and resolve there and allow love to guide you as God embodied. If there is no harm and the class is all with you and not distracted beyond their level to overcome as a yoga, then this person may really need to be there as they are and you may need it as well.

After you are totally through your yoga to find peace through all of this, the light will flow and you will be fine. This is challenging, it is not easy but as a teacher you are ready.

Y'all, take a look at OP's post history. This is a fake post.

A good tell is a post that seems designed to generate a lot of argument, and if it doesn't, then there's an edit that stokes the fires.

God this is the most annoying, and self righteous thread ever….

It’s odd that a male student is choosing a prenatal class to do his own flow. Why not choose a different class instead of one specifically marketed to pregnant folks, and with a female teacher. It feels…misogynistic in a way. Like he knows it’s more vulnerable and less likely to get push back.

If management isn’t willing to back you up, I would still ask him to take his headphones out for safety and stand in the back. I’d also make it clear at the beginning that if he becomes disruptive (for example you said “panting like a dog” lol) that he will need to redirect his practice.

Student here. Please don’t be a yoga nazi. The class is for the students. I once had a wrist injury, modified accordingly, and got yelled at by the teacher. Sometimes people don’t have a calming, quiet space to practice at home or they need some accountability to stay focused

If he is making noise during a quiet period then I would address that, and I like the suggestion of asking him to sit in the back. But being overly controlling is the opposite of yoga.