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LuciusDickusMaximus Archive

February 13th, 2019

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/r/cringe

7 years ago

Didn't Recognize my Ex-Wife's sister and asked her out on a date

I'm at the super market in my home town. Haven't been back in seven years. Coincidentally, that's when the divorce happened with my ex; let's call her Tammy. Anyway, I'm buying a watermelon and I see this cute girl who is also browsing the same fruits. Looking back at it, she seemed familiar, but, being the romantic I am, I believed I was simply astonished at her looks. So I ask her if she needs help picking out a watermelon. She's always been the forgetful type, and along with that I only saw her once before (she lived in Hong Kong), so I'm not shocked that she didn't go "oh, hey u/LuciusDickusMaximus, haven't seen you in ages." No, she just treats me like I was a stranger, so I think, bingo. I see no ring, so I keep flirting and eventually, I asked her if she has any plans for the evening, and she invites me to 'game night.' I agree (reluctantly because the last game night I had was with Tammy's family), and that night I go to the address she provided. Knocked on the door, was greeted by my ex-father-in-law and a shocked face that said "What the hell are you doing here?" I immediately ran and since then I pieced together (with the help of Facebook) the family tree.

It's pretty funny to think about now, but it was so cringy and I can't imagine how they must have cursed my name.

TL;DR: Ran into my ex-wife's sister at the market, and, not knowing it was her, asked her out and then found out at the doorstep what vile people she was related to.

February 13th, 2019

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Comments:

Beardopotamus

7 years ago

Help picking out a watermelon? Inviting a stranger to hang out with your family within minutes of meeting them? Not recognizing someone that's a sibling of someone you were married to, even if they "lived in Hong Kong" and you "only saw them once", in the age of social media... This all seems so legit, professor Howard/Elsting Shapiro intern guy. r/thatHappened

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Goal_Post_Mover

7 years ago

You lying piece of shit.

9

Irishnovember26

7 years ago

This is such a retardedly fake story you should be ashamed of yourself.

5

lukumi

7 years ago

Coincidentally, that's when the divorce happened with my ex; let's call her Tammy

Ron?

7

FILTHMcNASTY

7 years ago

This story is bullshit and you should be ashamed of yourself. How could you not recognize your ex wife's sister? Like at all? come on. Like she wouldn't recognize you? How did you not recognize the address? game night? give me a fucking break.

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Exxa3987

7 years ago

Yep also think this story is a steaming pile of horseshit

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[deleted]

7 years ago

[deleted]

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Dizzydsmith

7 years ago

You’d be better served giving him major props for his creative writing skills. He has posted several AMA’s that were deleted due to lack of proof (including once when he claimed to be a professor and was caught posting a picture of someone else as his “proof”).

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BuzzKyllington

7 years ago

knew this was bs the second "she" invited him to game night. so full of shit.

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LuciusDickusMaximus

7 years ago

How is it so hard to believe that I was invited to Game Night?? Surely you have been invited to something before?

LuciusDickusMaximus

7 years ago

I am a professor. The fiasco with that picture was the fault of one of the people from IT who set up my AMA. What of it?

mathisfakenews

7 years ago

Not just a professor but also a trauma surgeon and a barber. Where do you find all that time!

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TheConfusingWords

7 years ago

r/quityourbullshit

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