November 21st, 2022
4,961
TIFU by maybe accidentally inviting my plumber over for Thanksgiving
My plumber is a really nice guy with a heart of 24k gold. I've actually started smiling when I clog the toilet because it means he's coming over with his Italian accent and his arcane sense of humor (last time as he walked in and saw my ceramic cactus sculpture, he remarked: "it-a look-a like you have green tube guy, my friend"). I honestly couldn't say what it is about him that excites me so much; I guess we all have people in our lives that we for some reason just enjoy being around.
Yesterday, as he fixed my sink, we had one of our most intimate conversations ever. I told him about my family history of alcoholism, and he opened up about how his ex-wife was supposed to join him in the States a few years back but instead fell in love with another man. He lives alone here while all his family is still in Italy, and he just had a major falling out with three of his best friends.
After he was done working, I opened a bottle of tequila and we kept taking shots and talking until we were beyond fucked. At one point, I guess I felt really bad about his situation, so I invited him to Thanksgiving dinner and he began to weep. We hugged and he told me he appreciated it so much. Then we took three more shots and he drove home.
My wife was already displeased to come home and find me drunk on a Sunday and then when I told her that our plumber was coming to Thanksgiving dinner, she went off. We've only been married a few months, and this is going to be our first Thanksgiving "as a family." Her parents and siblings are coming over and it's a huge deal for her-- she really wants to prove herself as a hostess and an adult. She says there is no way the plumber is coming to Thanksgiving.
Now I have to call him or something and let him know he can't come, but that will shatter my heart and make his next house call very awkward. I might polish off the tequila tonight and send him a text or something. My palms are really sweaty as I type.
TL;DR: Got drunk and invited the plumber to my wife's inaugural Thanksgiving
November 21st, 2022
4,961
Comments:
yes_its_him
Then we took three more shots and he drove home.
WTF
6,770
Stoned_Wookiee
That's what I'm thinking. Hope the plumber made it home safely.
1,764
WizardsOfTheRoast
He's an Italian plumber, he probably just stomped on a turtle and hopped down a drain pipe and was home in the blink of an eye.
212
Stoned_Wookiee
Oddly enough, I was tempted to ask if the plumbers name was Mario or Luigi.
36
DevilBanner
Well, if he didn’t make it home, no uninviting needed… /s
1,108
yor_ur
Why drink and drive home when you can eat soap, smoke dope and fly home in a bubble? Smh
183
VanillaGorilla-
39
[deleted]
I though this….problem solved 🫣
8
Jopojussi
Dgaf about plumber i hope he didnt kill anyone.
200
Stoned_Wookiee
That's part of making it home safely IMO.
119
BurnerBoi_Brown
Am I a terrible person for picturing OP arguing with his wife while we hear a car crash in the distance and a burning tyre rolls by on the road outside
154
cantseeshittles
The "everything is fine" meme
43
Shadow293
“My leg!”
18
Dayofsloths
Right after a heart to heart about a family history of alcoholism. OP is a fucking idiot if their story is true
Also, who the fuck clogs a toilet so frequently you have a personal relationship with a plumber? That's fucked up.
684
yes_its_him
Could be drunk-plumber-for-Thanksgiving fan fiction I suppose?
191
Onespokeovertheline
Such a classic it's practically cliche
39
CNorm77
That's what I was thinking about clogging the toilet so much. Doesn't he have a poop knife?
136
Individual_Skill_763
Not even a poop wooden spoon?!?! Fucking animals
11
Apprehensive-Okra434
His plumber is either Mario or Luigi. OP is probably Toad and his wife, Toadette is rather displeased. She's probably just stressing about her friend Peach who was kidnapped by a large spiky turtle man.
39
Disney_Princess137
He fucked up twice
107
yokotron
Won’t need to call to cancel. Plunger is dead
33
var-foo
That's why he always has to call the plumber.
23
dwsinpdx
Check out post history looks like OP just makes shit up.
30
Sl1z
The whole story just seems strange. Who calls a plumber for a clogged toilet? And how often do you have plumbing issues that you have a regular plumber who you see enough to develop a close relationship with? And you open up about alcoholism in your family and then proceed to do tequila shots with your plumber? Then after you were already “beyond fucked” you take 3 more shots and drive home? It just kept getting crazier the more I read.
75
Objective_Tour_6583
Don't worry, he rode his Yoshi home.
21
Additional-Panic8003
Seriously. Invited him to dinner, but didn’t bother to invite him to stay over to avoid driving drunk? This story is two fuck ups in one. Also you sound like an alcoholic, no offense.
269
[deleted]
[deleted]
50
sirbassist83
t a place called
the united kingdommost of the world
all of the UK countries drink hard, the USA drinks hard, eastern europe and russia drink hard, Scandinavia drinks hard, australia drinks hard, and new zealand drinks hard.
22
Dresses_and_Dice
Just because alcoholism is common in a given place does not make it not alcoholism.
14
jahSEEus
Getting drunk on a Sunday? Doesn't sound horribly alcoholic by most metrics.
34
Coctyle
Completely wasted in the middle of the day because you got in a heavy conversation and you naturally chose to do enough shots to be totally fucked up, and then three more? And you have a family history of alcoholism?
I’m not going to label a stranger as an alcoholic based on a single incident, but that would definitely meet many people’s definition of irresponsible drinking and suggests a very bad relationship with alcohol. He was already completely drunk and was like, “We really need to do three more shots.”
33
cayosonia
Exactly, not even realizing that this is a massive fuck up is incomprehensible
23
ZBalboa
8,516
[deleted]
I would probably do a long speech about how that’s the spirit of thanksgiving. Plus, who wants to find another plumber.
1,911
[deleted]
Tbh I’d be leaning toward finding a new wife! She wants to be an adult and a hostess for her first Thanksgiving as a married woman? Perfect! This is a great time to shine!
867
pwpig
Maybe even marry the plumber!
159
fireky2
I hear he's single
44
throwmeinthettrash
I thought OP fancied the plumber at first
11
Brizilypuff
I second that lmao💀
34
elbartooriginal
Thats how we got this:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2021/11/18/grandma-thanksgiving-text-dench-hinton/
881
libertasi
I love this story. I look for it every year. ☺️
281
OneWinner490
I love this.
36
jerseyztop
❤️
18
PracticeAsleep
This. Do this. Before I retired my work partner and I would have a bunch of people over for brunch. We started just making breakfast for the wives and kids. Bit by bit we invited other friends and co-workers. We worked in a hospital so we would have doctors, friends, housekeeping and on a couple of occasions someone who was homeless. We had great food, as we usually did did a potluck. We also had great memories. Show the wife this. I promise at the end of the day it will be worth it.
522
badpuffthaikitty
I don’t have blood family except for my brother. I always host an orphans dinner for my friends that don’t have family, or can’t visit them for some reason. Spread the Love. Edit: He found a friend that night. Good on him.
177
naomicambellwalk
It sounds like the plumber is OP’s friend. OP should just say “I invited a friend to join.” Who cares it’s the plumber?
288
DomingoLee
Your wife will be fine.
She’ll be mad but she will end up having a warm heart once you get into the spirit. Having a grateful guest is what Thanksgiving is all about.
179
coffeeschmoffee
Unless she doesn’t and is a real bitch. There are wives that need total control out there. Those are the ones you need to ditch and quickly.
30
LuciusDickusMaximus
I think you’re right, thanks. Gonna talk to my wife and see how it goes. I think she was mostly pissed because this isn’t the first time I’ve made a decision without consulting her because of alcohol.
842
[deleted]
Yes, you definitely should have consulted your wife. But your heart was in the right place and at this point standing by your invitation is the right thing to do.
386
SigmundFreud
In your defense, it's only weird if you introduce him as "my plumber" instead of "my friend", like when Larry David went out on the town with an exterminator.
295
particlemanwavegirl
THIS is the simple, obvious answer. And it's TRUE. They drank together. They cried together. They ARE friends! And if the family asks "how did you meet?" you can just say it is a funny story and tell the real story and literally just pretend it was ages ago and not just the other day.
220
Helenium_autumnale
He's your friend, OP. And friends are always welcome.
63
adube440
Curb came to my mind too, but when Larry invited someone over for Passover without telling Cheryl. Cheryl was so pleased that Larry made a friend, and the friend had no place to go for the holliday she was like "of course he has to come over!" She was so proud.
Then Larry, as he casually walks up stairs, says, "Oh, the guy I invited, he miiight be sex offender that just moved to town." And then of course she blew up.
29
Poinsettia917
Maybe it’s time to take a hard look at your alcohol use.
1,470
[deleted]
And not let the plumber drive home next time if you're going to get hammered.
624
rbiopsy
Invite him to stay overnight instead
30
animalisticneeds
The wife will love that!!
30
CletusP
Maybe it isn't a family history of alcohol abuse. It's still going 😬
105
ohonagang
How often does op drunkenly invite people too … feel like he may be burying the lede.
38
Poinsettia917
Thanks to whomever gave me the award!
40
oakislandorchard
she is 100% pissed about you getting shit faced and worried about the image the plumber will put off. she's worried he will act like a slob, I think the reality is he would be on his best behavior around everyone else.
167
aoeuismyhomekeys
He sounds like he'd be the life of the party.
51
monty6666
If he's as great a guy as OP says, his wife's family will probably really like him too, unless they are snobs who think they're too good to eat with a plumber.
19
WinCo_Wonderland
The fucking plumber probably makes more money than the rest of them combined.
13
TechFreshen
You have a good heart but you have a binge drinking problem that is rather frightening
46
Elderberry1923
Hey also they sell these things called plungers. They do what you’re calling someone over for on a Sunday. Unclog your own damn toilet man!
65
relativelyfunkadelic
honestly, if it has gotten to the point so many times that he's gotten this close with his plumber, something tells me the things OP is doing to that toilet cannot be fixed by plunge alone...
44
last_rights
I've invited all sorts of people to Thanksgiving. I warn them my parents are very traditional first. Thanksgiving isn't about being formal and weird, it's about being together.
25
StatisticianLivid710
I’ve told my parents that I’ve given my ex gf an open invitation to any of the big 3 holidays. We’re friends now and her family sucks, so she has an open invite to join us. When we were dating she joined us for Easter because her family ditched her. At least now she has a cute 2 yo (not mine) to bring over, my mom loves babies/toddlers!
Better to show love to others than to exclude them and them to feel alone. OP if you and the mrs are Christian, ask her what Christ would do in this situation.
25
[deleted]
Exactly! What she can invite her entire family and he can’t bring ONE person? Smh doesn’t matter how they kno each other.
Ngl tho, didn’t expect this to be a story with a twist.
29
Masagmarod
Do not uninvite him. If he broke down when you invited him originally it will do a terrible amount of harm. Who knows, you might have been that tiny sliver of hope that things aren't terrible that he needed. I have been in the lowest place possible and just another human showing some compassion and acknowledgement of my existence was enough to turn it around. Please don't uninvite him.
Edit- imagine if both of these people have just said wrong number, instead of connecting.
https://variety.com/2021/film/news/thanksgiving-grandma-wrong-text-netflix-movie-1235124198/
4,719
ih8javert
Totally agree with u/masagmarod. This would break the poor guy. I was a first responder and this time of year is when there's usually an increase in suicides.
Besides, your wife is cooking already. How hard would it be to feed one more person. I wish I was in a position to make a friend that you're excited to see.
848
Kroos_Control
Definitely this.
I was at the lowest point in my life and the only positive thing in the future was that I was meeting my LDR gf in a week. Guess what she did. She broke up with me before that, telling me that she was cheating on me. That fucked me up so badly. I sometimes wonder it's a miracle I survived those days.
77
Masagmarod
Glad your in a better place.
20
Andromeda0G
Omg there’s going to be a Netflix movie about this? :’)
80
kiase
Then we took three more shots and he drove home.
Sounds like somebody effed up way worse than you that night. Better make sure he’s still alive and not incarcerated so that he can even come to Thanksgiving dinner.
1,747
beesdoitbirdsdoit
Yeah, I like how OP just glosses over this. Like…this is terribly irresponsible behavior.
523
Kickit007
alcoholism.
Driving fucked up in the states is incredibly common, despite the court costs and criminal penalties. I don’t do it, but I think I’m the only adult male without a dui in my workplace if several hundred
184
One_Umpire_8425
You're right, I know several people with DUIs
28
SMRAintBad
Drunks have a funny way about things. My Uncle is a drunkard, and he once crashed his car into a street light at 3 AM. He ran from the scene and hid in his garage.
He proceeded to call my then step father, a police officer, and asked him what he should do. I think it goes without saying that things did not go in his favor.
70
[deleted]
[deleted]
26
SMRAintBad
That’s true. My former step father hated everyone including my uncle, so he was on that one quick. Anytime he had the chance to throw the book at someone he would.
7
MuggyFuzzball
OP seems like a terribly irresponsible person so it's not surprising.
Almost everything he said revealed a fuckup in some way.
24
shoe710
1,253
AG74683
1,460
bsw814
Thank you! “Every time I clog the toilet I get a smile on my face cos my plumber is coming over” or whatever op said. Who the fuck clogs their shit that they need a plumber so much??
797
Isntlifefunny
I guess they are in need of a poop knife.
210
BunBunny_draws
NOT THE POOP KNIFE
43
lxxTBonexxl
I bet the plumber has a poop knife.
Maybe he can bring it to thanksgiving
18
[deleted]
I'm predicting the next post is going to be "TIFU by cheating on my wife with my plumber"
274
redryan243
Tifu by inviting the plumber in me
67
samarm132
Tifu by letting the plumber clean my pipes 😩
43
LadyBug_0570
Don't be ridiculous. The plumber will get an art room first.
18
Atiggerx33
I have never clogged my toilet bad enough that a plunger couldn't fix it.
157
[deleted]
Nor has OP in any likelihood. Plumber gets paid a nice hourly rate, plunges a toilet for 2 minutes, has a chat, several shots and goes home.
80
w311sh1t
That line alone makes me think this is a made up story by some dude that’s trying to make it in comedy. I’d say a solid 50-60% of the posts here are made up.
14
TheNOLAJohnson
Dudes anus must be massive lol
9
Grove-Of-Hares
Even if you did clog the toilets weekly, how bad is it that you couldn’t just take a plunger to it yourself?
7
-Heis3nberg-
Great point. The only time I’ve had something close to this is living in an apartment and having the same maintenance guy
43
fireky2
You have a plumber after you get fucked over by a plumber. The first time you get one who's decent you never want them to go
41
mykecameron
I rent an apartment in a very old duplex that hasn't been updated in any meaningful way since the 70s. We end up with a plumber here about 2 or 3 times a year. Never called one over a clogged toilet (sounds like someone needs to invest in a plunger, especially if they own this spot and are paying this plumber every time they go a little overboard with the TP), usually it's about the ancient boiler or a leak. Would be more cost effective to do regular maintenance but hey its not my house. Anyway we got to know the last guy pretty well, not invite to holidays or get wasted on a Sunday afternoon well, but ask about his family well, and he noticed when our cat died. He retired and now we get a different plumber each time, I must admit I kind of miss the guy. Not enough to invite him to Thanksgiving though.
7
[deleted]
Maybe I’m used to it because a lot of my family works trades, but if you a general contractor you will have a “plumber”.
7
Stooneye
"I've actually started smiling when I clog the toilet"
Buddy, you don't ever let the world take that away from you.
166
Prind25
1,387
bryanna_leigh
The more fucked up part about this story is that you let him drive home drunk. Shame!
253
particlemanwavegirl
Yes this was the most tragic part for me as well
53
spacklebat13
If he was really drunk when he drove away, you may have nothing to worry about. He might have died in a terrible accident, so this could be a non-issue.
37
kevvok
"What are you doing step-plumber?"
182
boogermike
You get your hands stuck under the sink again?
40
OkapiEli
Just build an art room that needs a sink so that you need him to come to install it.
26
saph_pearl
The joke prevails! AITA threatened me with a ban for referencing it recently :(
4
cardcomm
It's the wife that doesn't want him to come over - let her sleep with the plumber!
27
Prind25
Alright. Fuck both the wife and the plumber, that will surely fix this.
28
BrandonR2300
532
[deleted]
right im wondering if the wife is more mad about the drinking & yet another drunk decision, not the plumber himself
I mean the dude was drinking while discussing his genetic predisposition for alcoholism then let his friend drive home shit-faced
edit:
looks like OP mostly confirmed the possibility
"I think you’re right, thanks. Gonna talk to my wife and see how it goes. I think she was mostly pissed because this isn’t the first time I’ve made a decision without consulting her because of alcohol."
318
nysraved
Discussed a family history of alcoholicism, taking shots until they are “beyond fucked”, made a rash decision, then casually as if it’s not a big deal adds that they took 3 MORE shots and the plumber drove home… yeah OP may want to reflect on their relationship with alcohol
197
adube440
And was going to finish off the bottle before he reached out to the plumber again.
77
Poinsettia917
Then he flipped out when he was called out on it.
20
Pepsiman1031
Went down a rabbit hole going through OPs post history.
17
BrandonR2300
I was confused at first but then if you read his profile description, it’s actually a account specifically made to be a burner. Multiple users use that exact profile to post anonymously
12
kimfromlastnight
“ I opened a bottle of tequila and we kept taking shots and talking until we were beyond fucked.
Then we took three more shots and he drove home.“
… what the fuck? He’s got a heart of gold but he doesn’t give two shits about the safety of all the other motorists on the road??
1,074
[deleted]
and talking about his family history of alcoholism
and his wife was pissed to find him drunk on a Sunday
im wondering if maybe the wife's anger and resistance is about something else they've been dealing with longer
edit:
OP seems to confirm
"I think you’re right, thanks. Gonna talk to my wife and see how it goes. I think she was mostly pissed because this isn’t the first time I’ve made a decision without consulting her because of alcohol."
752
Ghost17088
All of his other comments are a train wreck too. Like no shit your wife doesn’t want her alcoholic husband’s newest drinking buddy showing up to Thanksgiving.
288
rengothrowaway
She knows he’s gonna get wasted with his plumber friend and embarrass her and make an ass of himself in front of her family.
154
MisterZoga
Should be a quick open and shut marriage.
11
Icy4706
Is OP going to help prepare dinner? It's also very possible she has a specific amount of food planned out for everyone and now suddenly has to cater to a guest she didn't know would be coming just days before the holiday.
46
[deleted]
It's an italian plumber, he probably just warped home through the toilet and op is trying to keep his secret.
85
riannaearl
This is the most logical answer.
6
Icy_Engine_7648
187
spacecandle
140
emanuel19861
They took 3 more shots to sober up, read the text!
/s
48
[deleted]
Should've used cocaine for that
7
MitP94
102
rengothrowaway
He just wants a drinking buddy for the holiday.
Meanwhile his wife is getting dragged in the comments. Something tells me she knows they’re going to get wasted and embarrass her in front of her family and ruin Thanksgiving.
And then drive drunk. Again.
137
meowmeowoww
Maybe this house too have a room that can be converted into an art room
14
DataSquid2
Someone else mentioned their profile is a rabbit hole, and it really is. This story is absolutely made up bs. They're just here to write fiction and then flame people.
37
Tier_Z
Did no one else pick up on the plumber literally being Mario?? I mean come on. Italian plumber (who talks-a like-a this-a) who's wife left him for someone else (Bowser) and he left his 3 best friends (Luigi, Toad, and Yoshi) behind when he moved to the States? Please.
ETA: Oh and also the cactus being "green tube guy"
21
ms_sophaphine
Their profile is actually a burner account used by different people
7
candysweet434
I don’t even think his story is real. If you go to OP’s profile, it says the account is used by hundreds of users as a burner account.
11
LilacTidalWave
Apparently its a shared acc. Likely a different guy.
7
FrigidPredator
216
funtimefrankie1
He's a crazio...
30
Longjumping-Canary22
Drinking and driving is stupid and dangerous.
47
funtimefrankie1
Itsa tru
44
Prind25
Itsa quick tripa if ya use da green pipas
17
Memotome
Wassa jure nayme?
6
Prind25
Why itsa mario!
10
[deleted]
41
Jack_RabBitz
If they uninvit him they’re definitely going to have major plumbing problems that day
9
[deleted]
All I hear is the curb your enthusiasm music playing as the wife looks at a toliet overflowing on her important day.
10
speedkat
I told him about my family history of alcoholism
-- >I opened a bottle of tequila and we kept taking shots and talking until we were beyond fucked
-- >we took three more shots
-- >I might polish off the tequila tonight and send him a text or something
This isn't worth dancing around. You've got a problem, and you know you've got a problem, and you're trying to pretend that your "family history of alcoholism" makes it not your fault.
283
No-Debt626
You’re forgetting the he drove home part after the three more shots
82
brandonwest18
Boyyyyyy are there a lot of unmarried morons in this chat. The plumber is irrelevant. The point is that you clearly have a drinking problem, only 3 months into marriage got trashed while she’s gone, made holiday decisions without her, and let a dude who was 3 shots beyond trashed drive on the road. He could have killed an entire family dude. Then, you think, to tell him lightly, you need to drink again to get the courage.
You’re an alcoholic who inconsiderately ignores your wife, and it feels like this is a pattern. Everyone saying your wife is a bitch or “not the one” in the comments is absurd. Get help, it’s not about the Plummer, don’t ruin your marriage over drinking.
141
Pmac3456
Also the amount if people blatantly advising to just ignore his wife. Some choice comments
"Better to ask forgiveness than permission"
"She's cooking anyways, one more mouth to feed"
"Your wife isn't embracing the thanksgiving spirit"
"Your wife is being a terrible host if she refuses"
I wouldn't even give then the benefit of being unmarried, if you have the slightest sense of empathy it's clear why she's upset that her alcoholic husband got wasted on a Sunday with the plumber, invited him over for a holiday she has to cook for, without consulting her or warning her at all, and her first impression of this stranger is that he got equally pissed with her husband, then drove home.
I would be calling myself to apologise and rescind the invite. This isn't even the first time OP has done something like this.
35
namegoeswhere
Right? Buch of inconsiderate asses, and I feel bad if they have a partner in their lives.
Guy is an alcoholic. That is the issue here, not some poorly-thought-out invitation.
They clearly don't know what it's like to come home to a drunk. It's devastating.
6
brandonwest18
Yep. So many ways to make that Plummer feel loved that don’t involve spiraling out of sobriety whenever your wife leaves the house. Poor woman.
4
[deleted]
122
aminot123
I thought it was a made up story about playing Mario on thanksgiving…
42
Andromeda0G
phew I thought it was just me reading it like this. I felt dirty reading it at work and was thinking the whole time “why is this not marked NSFW”
15
GypsySnowflake
I assumed it was a single woman
11
XxRefuse2Lose
18
Tigerboop
65
rengothrowaway
For sure after he and the plumber get wasted at Thanksgiving in front of her family and embarrass her.
25
FG88_NR
My wife was already displeased to come home and find me drunk on a Sunday and then when I told her that our plumber was coming to Thanksgiving dinner, she went off. We've only been married a few months, and this is going to be our first Thanksgiving "as a family." Her parents and siblings are coming over and it's a huge deal for her-- she really wants to prove herself as a hostess and an adult. She says there is no way the plumber is coming to Thanksgiving.
I think your wife is kind of missing the point of Thanksgiving and what it means to "be an adult." But you have to help, like, actually help. Not just watch potatos boil thwn drink on the couch haha.
Side note, getting drunk while discussing the long line of alcohol abuse in your family is no buneo. Getting drunk with someone and letting them drive shortly afterwards is even worse. That's your fuck up in this story, not inviting a lonely person to dinner.
241
[deleted]
Why is no one else mentioning that the plumber drove home?! Wtf, that’s not normal or ok.
As for the wife, I agree, part of being a good hostess is welcoming people, even the people you don’t necessarily want there. Uninviting an invited guest is shitty. That said, I’m not sure that I would be ok with someone who drinks and drives coming to my house either.
91
SteveBored
His wife has every write to get pissed about getting drunk with some random and then inviting him for dinner.
18
VinnyEnzo
14
[deleted]
38
BirthdayCarFire
47
vicemagnet
21
Reuvil
19
itastlikbutterscotch
she really wants to prove herself as a hostess and an adult
Flipping out and refusing to show kindness and compassion……this is not how one proves themselves as a quality hostess, or as a stable adult. I believe that I’d be finding the nicest way possible to express this, and a strong intent to have your newly invited friend over for dinner.
A discussion with your spouse would have been ideal, and I understand her frustration, but she isn’t showing many signs of maturity.
251
Chimpucated
I don't question his wife's maturity by not wanting this plumber in their house on Thanksgiving. He drank on the job with a client and expressed personal issues openly with him. It's a sad story but it's smart of the wife to refuse to allow a total stranger around her and her family on an intimate holiday considering the circumstances.
She's trying to be a quality host to her family. Maybe her family would disapprove of being around a stranger to them on the holiday as well. It's ok not to trust everyone around you.
68
nysraved
I agree that the wife is justified in not wanting the plumber over, but to be fair the plumber drank with OP AFTER the job was done, and I don’t see openly expressing personal issues as necessarily being a problem (especially since it sounds like OP initiated the personal conversations). I get that as a general rule of thumb it’s not always smart to get personal with coworkers or clients, but I don’t think that’s an indictment on the plumber’s character.
What DOES make me somewhat question the plumber’s character and lend credence to why it makes sense for the wife to not be so trusting, is him driving drunk and also I’m kinda curious about the story of him having a major fallout with 3 of his best friends. I’m generalizing here, but if a group of 4 close friends kicks one of the friends from the circle, I would assume more times than not that the friend kicked from the group did something fucked up.
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[deleted]
Have your friend over for Thanksgiving.
Of course your wife is upset. It's her first family Thanksgiving. She's stressing because she wants it to be a special, memorable occasion for you and her family.
What she doesn't want is her husband and his friend getting drunk at the dinner table, making plans for next year.
If you want to make up for it, do some shopping, some cooking, some cleaning...help her make the day special, memorable, by taking some of the responsibility from her...and allowing her some time to enjoy what she planned and executed.
Maybe you and your friend clear the table and wash the dishes, after dinner. That will give her a little extra time with her family...and maybe give you some brownie points with the in-laws.
There are ways to make this work for everyone, while keeping it in the spirit of Thanksgiving.
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FNCVazor
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[deleted]
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lauralamb42
It sounds like the issue is he isn't talking to his wife about decisions often. While I think having the plumber over is great I would be pissed about being left out of the decision making and coming home to a shitfaced husband too.
30
Pmac3456
This, the wife doesn't see this as "my husband has a lonely friend he wants to invite to thanksgiving", she sees "my husband has ince again gotten shit-faced and made another rash decision on our behalf, leaving me with more work... again"
If OP had been sober and explained the situation I'm sure she would be far less stern than she is right now. She thinks OP just wants a drinking buddy to get plastered with, and idk if she's entirely wrong. They're both irresponsible drinkers.
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Prind25
"Your honor you know what they say, "its better to ask forgiveness than permission" right?"
"Sir you stole someone's organs"
"I apologized!"
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_JFKFC_
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baronofcream
Some of y’all in the comments are ridiculous. If my spouse got hammered and invited a random tradesman to a FAMILY HOLIDAY DINNER - much less my very first one as host - I would be pissed and say no too. In no way is the wife in the wrong here. What is wrong with you people 😂
OP, tell the plumber that you realised your wife was expecting to spend Thanksgiving with family only, but you’d love to have him over for dinner some other time really soon. Show your wife the respect she deserves and DO NOT “let him come and just ask for forgiveness later” as some are suggesting, because that is a terrible idea.
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ForeverInBlackJeans
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[deleted]
I was waiting for some Mario joke and was delightfully surprised that there wasn’t
Who cares invite him as a friend, she should understand after his story
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HowWeDoingTodayHive
Well…
“it-a look-a like you have green tube guy, my friend”
I dunno, is that a Mario reference?
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Somethingawesomeonly
6
chuchofreeman
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linedancergal
I'm sure by now you realise that in future you need to check with your wife before inviting someone to a meal. But this time I would go to her and apologise and beg for forgiveness. Offer to help her as much as possible. But ask her not to be punish the plumber for your mistake. One extra person shouldn't make a huge difference, and he was so excited to be invited.
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Yollm
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Namebtaken
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awill316
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urgh_srsly
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Raven_of_Blades
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Azrai113
I think it's that he's drunk and making drunk decisions that shes gonna have to account for. I doubt this really has anything to do with the plumber himself. OP just put a bunch more social obligations on his wife without even asking her. I'm hoping that's what she's upset about, anyway. I don't want drunk anyone making choices for me (including myself lol) and you'd think the person you'd literally just married would at least think of you before burdening you. The wife is the one trapped in this scenario. Yes means more unexpected work (with no help volunteered from OP) and no makes her look cold hearted.
OP could have told the plumber he wanted to invite the plumber but would check with wifey first. Instead, he didn't even think of her, and when he did, she was an afterthought. Ouch. And after all that to be portrayed as someone being cold hearted just to show off? Yeh I'd be upset too and probably really embarrassed that my husband humiliated me so publicly.
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Prind25
Just Imagine all the free sink repairs!
11